Initial thoughts

*yawns* what time is it? I see.. It's 6 in the morning. oh, w8... hey, someone's already awake... hmm, I hear my mom and dad laughing, I think they're sort of reminiscing the past together. They sound so happy. nice.

Rn xnt zbstzkkx sqhdc sn qdzs sghr? gdgd. deenqs. =]

I went for a walk last night, it really helped me clear my mind a bit. I missed that. Maybe that's why I was all jittery yesterday, I just needed a breath of the cold evening air. I missed the serene ambiance of the empty street, during the night, which I am so used to. I even had the chance to talk to a friend, (neighbor-friends, when was the last time I actually talked to them? 3 months ago? we used to hang and talk for hours every weekend! anyway,), actually he's more like my brothers' friend and he made me share some inexplicable mysteries that I used to read (e.g. Bermuda's triangle, Loch ness, etc.). I had fun, though the conversation didn't last long. I needed some time alone to process things.

I also tried to stargaze. The stars were barely visible. The clouds were obstructing them from my view. I stayed until strangers began to arrive. Turned out that there was a birthday party next door and the celebrator was actually a friend. I went to the nearest computer shop to escape all the commotion, plus they were beginning to get drunk and men started to take a leak on a nearby vacant lot which was just a few feet away from where I was standing.

Surprisingly, the time I spent surfing the net didn't improve my mood at all so I went home feeling defeated. Tried to watch a movie, still had no effect. Around 12MN, I went to bed and drifted straight to dreamland, whew, It's a good thing that I am no longer Insomniac.

I am not pleased with the way I acted the whole weekend. I didn't give a lot of attention to my brothers (so unlike me).I should have followed my instinct, shouldn't have come this weekend. My family didn't deserve to see me in that state.

I'm really really hoping for a better mood this week. Although, It's not apparent to me how that would be possible since I've soo much to do, exams and deadlines are all queued up.